Avoidants are the most loyal lovers and involved fathers on the other side of being trusted. They heal through being trusted.

Trust is perceived not by you letting him fuck you, even if he may have been wired and or conditioned to think a woman opening sexually elicits a pleasurable feeling (unconscious drive to be trusted which may be exhibited as a voracious sexual appetite).

Trust him. As a man. How do you know? You just know, you will feel it even before you say hello. If it feels like an effort to trust him, it’s not there yet. If it’s natural to trust him, bear the brunt of the conditioning of distortion and history by becoming his cheerleader. He likely has no one like that if you trust him naturally.

But always remember, your pleasure is the guardian of a sexual exchange, not his prestige, power, fame, or fortune. The more of those he has, the more his desire for you becomes an opportunity for bringing social transformation, through being non-negotiable on your most delicious terms for sexual/emotional completion. Women who are sexually active, are crowning kings or crooks each time we say yes, when we feel like saying no.